Because we have six kids, one thing I am always mindful of is making sure they know they have a place in our home. I don’t want them to feel lost in the crowd or that another sibling is more loved or important. I want them to know they’re equally loved and wanted. So why would I only surprise one of my six kids with a weekend getaway?
Big families are crazy and loud and loving but sometimes it’s quite overwhelming for all of us. It’s during those times it’s easy to lump everyone together forget they are individuals with different needs and desires. Because of this, we strive to make time for them individually. We love spending one-on-one time with them through parent-kid dates. It might be something like dinner and a movie or even better–a free activity like tractor time with Daddy or hiking with Mama. The kids love having our undivided attention and it strengthens our relationship. More importantly, it gives us a special time to dig deeper into their thoughts and share quiet times together.
WEEKEND GETAWAY FOR ONE
But when they reach eleven years old, Mama (if it’s a daughter) and Daddy (if it’s a son), surprises them with an overnight trip. We don’t travel far but stay in our hometown of St. Augustine so we can reduce driving time and maximize our adventures. It’s a weekend filled with fun geared toward that child’s unique interests. For one daughter, it looked like a movie, spa day, and window shopping. For another, it looked like the circus, the beach, and rollerblading. For the boys, I’m sure they’ll prefer camping and extreme activities.
The getaway is for the 11-12 year old as they enter the tween years where they begin to experience countless physical and emotional changes. It’s an intentional time to enjoy each other’s company without distractions while focusing on teaching them about adolescence and what changes they’ll soon, if not already, face. If we chose to do this in a public setting, like in front of their siblings, I can only imagine their embarrassment. But because we approach it one-on-one, they’re open to discussions and feel the freedom to ask questions about the process. We’ve talked about sex multiple times but this is the perfect opportunity to begin discussions about the teen years.
Using the Bible and the Preparing for Adolescent CDs, a tool from Dr. James Dobson, we have relaxed mini sessions to tackle their questions and find answers to everything they need (and want) to know about growing up. Not only about their bodily changes but also how God intends for them to use and grow spiritually in this body He’s given them. It’s been a hit so far with the girls and the boys are chomping at the bit to reach the “magical age” for their turn.
They are eager to know why these changes are happening and grateful to discuss it privately while throwing in all kinds of fun on the side so this getaway is the perfect opportunity for us. It doesn’t require an extravagant stay anywhere (camping in the backyard is free!) but if you want to choose the hotel route like I did, there are plenty of resources and apps for discounted stays or even restaurants which I highly recommend!
A GLIMPSE OF OUR GETAWAY
Personalizing your getaway to suit your child’s favorite activities is a must. You want this to be a time where you try out all the things they love and enjoy it with them! Even if it means risking your life on a pair of rollerblades (cough, cough!).
I chose to blend free activities with costly ones and made sure to utilize all the local discounts I could. Choosing Express deals on Priceline for an overnight stay saved us a ton! Groupon is a great resource too! Our weekend could’ve been an expensive one but we saved so much money on coupon and discount sites.
If you’re looking for your own tools for a getaway weekend with your teen, I recommend researching your options. While I love Dr. Dobson, this material is pretty dated and we will probably use something else for the boys. I’ve heard great things about Passport 2 Purity and I’m sure there are others. If you have used a resource and loved it, please share! I have four sons waiting for a getaway weekend and I’m thinking about switching up what material we use. I’d love to hear about your experiences!
Is a getaway weekend in the works for your tween?